Nov 10, 2014

I turned 20

last Deepavali hehe - Wednesday, 22/10/2014

As i grew older, birthday doesn't excite me anymore. Instead, it scares the shit out of me. But i still look forward to it as people basically shower you with dua's and good wishes Alhamdulillah. However, was very (yes, Naim. VERY spelled with capital letters) disappointed with Naim as he decided not to spend the perfectly-timed-public-holiday-which-was-on-my-birthday with me.

Aamiin ya rabbal 'alamin: ﺁﻣِﻴْﻦُ ﻳَﺎ ﺭَﺏَّ ﺍﻟْﻌَﺎﻟَﻤِﻴْﻦ

Moving along with the time, a lot of things have changed. 

I am now a grown up lady though at times I refused to admit it and still act like I'm 10. I realized that I am no longer the girl with stony, stubborn heart. I apologize for my mistakes and forgive people easily. No more an egomaniac. That's a good thing right?

I also spent a lot on girly things like dresses, skirts, lipsticks & heels! It's like everywhere i go, every shopping site i browsed, there's always something (usually almost everything) that caught my attention and forced me to put them in the cart/shopping bag. Half of me wants to be all girly, you know the slumber party pedicure manicure pinkish kind of girly and the other half goes 'relax woman, be cool act cool, jeans and shirts like always will do' and I'll end up buying outfits for each half! *cries*

I'm now more tolerable, I care even less about what people think of me (that has never bother me anyway), I just love unconditionally, I do things without expecting anything in returns and I have started believing that things will fall into place eventually.

Things that need to be improved is obviously my studies. I just got distracted so freaking easily i need it to stop. Next is my relationship with everyone. And my love life with the loved ones. A few things need to be sorted out.

InsyaAllah, all is well.

20 years (and 19 days) old. Perpetual xs & os 


.Dayah Othman. said...

I love you -dayh-

Chqz said...

dayahhhh! nawh thank you, i love you too :) take care in states!

Chqz said...

eh, UK hihi

Amni Ghapar said...

reading your blog makes me miss you even more than i miss mien hahaha i miss you ainal! take a good care of yourself!