May 10, 2014

untuk Ainal sayang

I've been waiting to say all these and even more to you since a long time. It might surprise you that I am writing to you; but you know, sometimes where there is too much to say, a man prefers writing to all else.
You know, ours is a very special relationship. We both know how hopelessly we're in love with each other without ever saying so. Its been tacitly accepted by both of us without feeling the need to express anything poetically or melodramatically.
Like a sparkling crystal vase, you are delicate, fragile and just precious to me. The dark, deep eyes set in contrast to the fair face have the depth and gleam that makes me drown myself in them. I love to be close to you, to protest and to make you feel the same about me.
I remember the first time I met you, it was one of the best moments of my life and I thank god for giving me such a moment. When I saw you, a tiny angel but a quiet lady who seemed to be in a similar plight, something out of this world, some force of attraction gave me the courage and initiative to approach you. I couldn't understand it then, but I am glad that I did talk to you then.
I couldn't understand why you were so special to me. But the time we spent together was so enchanting that each moment without you is like epoch. I only know how difficult it was for me to restrain myself from rushing to you and to concentrate on my work. In fact, whenever this tension had reached the crescendo, I called you up half-afraid that you would be angry over my disturbing you during work.
There was something else about you, though you were not readily sociable types. Yet you seemed to tell me everything about you, your home, family, your feelings and work. I was your emotional support and seemed to occupy a unique and special place in your heart. When you cried out your griefs and sorrows into my bosom, the feeling of my being close to you, engulfing you in my arms seemed to make you feel safe and secure. I felt extremely happy and proud to give you this support and comfort.
And somewhere along the way, I opened up without even realizing so and anything that made me happy or sad, I couldn't wait to share it with you. We both knew it when we slowly developed this deep and intellectual love. It was so enchanting and it completely pulled us into this whirling center.
It gives me a great pride to show the world how madly I am in love with you my petite delicate darling. I am immensely satisfied that I love a girl who makes me lose myself in her. My cherished moments are our long walks under the sunshine and the moonlit, under the clouds of my world with you and the soothing gaze of the stars. I'm madly in love with a girl who completely amalgamates herself with me. I love the way she sparkles at my achievements, and the sheer delight that creeps through her when she is swept of her feet. I love that most special lady in the world... Oh! I love you, my sweet heart.

[June 2013]

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